Clearing Up The Myths About How To Fix A Broken Relationship

“Reality be damned! If life isn’t like the moves then I want no part of it!” Thus said I, about five years ago when my long term partner left for another woman. Now, in a movie, this would have been tragic, but in the end, it would probably turn out okay. He would see the error of his ways, and come running back to me. Unfortunately, this isn’t how it ended up. Why? Because the tricks that work in the movies aren’t necessarily how to fix a broken relationship in real life.

How To Fix A Broken Relationship In Real Life

 I once heard that Rom-Coms (romantic comedies) are the equivalent of porn for women. Just like porn, which gives men unrealistic ideas of what to expect from girls, rom-coms give women unrealistic expectations from men. In reality, your man is probably not going to come begging you back and marry you after he finds out he IS actually madly in love with you. Usually it takes a little more effort on your side to make him realize he is still madly in love with you. And, if you are a guy, your woman is probably not going to have a heartfelt talk with your mother so that they can stop fighting and be best friends, instead. While fixing relationships can be easy in the movies, in real life, it takes a little more effort.

So, how do you figure out how to fix a broken relationship if you don’t have the scriptwriter on your side?

Well, a very good place to start is by reading the Magic of Making Up. This book was written by a somewhat strange, yet very insightful character who goes by the name of T Dub (short for T.W. Jackson). This guy was an army brat and has lived in dozens of different countries. This experience has given him a unique perspective on human relationships in many different cultures. So, as I’ve found, his advice is pretty much spot-on regardless of how “terrible” you feel your relationship has gotten. This book has opened my eyes and has eliminated many of the misconceptions I had about how to fix a broken relationship.

These are a few of the “myths” this book has cleared up for me, and I think that you will find them useful, as well, in your quest to fix your relationship.

Myth 1:

If you want to get your partner back, you need to go out of your way to shower them with love and affection. Basically don’t leave them alone until they are begging you to take them back.

Reality:

In real life, this doesn’t work. People don’t appreciate that which they have always had. If your partner is losing interest in you, one of the worst things that you can do is shove your brand of “affection” down their throats. This will only make them want to distance themselves from you even more. What you should really do is give them some time to miss you. This is known as a “no contact” period in the Magic of Making Up and you can find the complete “no contact” plan there. This works because it lets your partner realize your value. You aren’t just “there”. They could actually lose you! This usually shakes disinterested partners up quite a bit, and can solve the problem quickly.

Myth 2:

All differences can be worked out in one well thought out “gesture”… (perhaps try getting random strangers to dance (perfectly choreographed) while you sing an incredibly fitting song (off the top of your head) about how you feel about your partner?)

Well... If it worked for Jessica Alba!...

Reality:

Breakups are usually not caused, nor can they be saved, by one large act or gesture. More often it is the “little things” that make or break a relationship. If you want to have a long and happy relationship, you cannot forget the little things. A romantic dinner is not going to make up for my husband not saying “thank you” when I went out of my way to cook him pancakes just the way he likes them (this is HUGE because I’m not very good at cooking). It is the little things that show the temperature of the relationship, and it’s the little things that can save a relationship from going south. Subtle differences in the way that you interact with your partner can have a huge impact on how well things go when you are trying to repair a relationship.

Myth 3:

You need to conform to a certain standard if you hope to be attractive to your partner (i.e. She’s All That)

DON

Reality:

While it is very important to look good for your partner (the Magic of Making Up even has a section devoted to relearning how to take good care of yourself) it is important that you don’t base your standard of attractiveness on somebody else. This will only leave you feeling inadequate and insecure, which is not attractive at all. Just try to be the very best that YOU can be. This will give you that sexy confidence that men and women both find so attractive.

These are just a few of the misconceptions that I have had about how to fix a broken relationship. If you think that you are struggling with these issues, or you feel like no matter what you do, you aren’t having any success, I highly suggest you go check out T Dub’s website. It’s chock full of useful information and devilishly simple strategies to get your ex back and save your relationship.